First- Thank you for all your thoughts and well wishes :)
I tried to answer each of you- I hope I didn't miss anyone!
My son moved up a step in his Karate class today- his first step towards a yellow belt. Both he and my daughter can now do things that I can not- or haven't ever learned to do. It's a wonderful and strange feeling to hear her play the piano, or to watch T go through the moves of his routine. Someone else taught them these things, and in a way, they are now teaching me...but truthfully, they've been teaching me since the day they were born!
I admire them both in many ways.
At dinner tonight my daughter asked me this question:
"Mom, where do you think the 'soul' is in our body? And do you think the heart has feelings- or do all feelings come from the mind?"
I didn't give much thought to those kinds of questions until I was in my late teens, or in college!
I told her that I liked the idea that the soul is not so much inside of us, as it is something that surrounds us, kind of like a forcefield, but was also connected to us.
I also explained that hundreds or thousands of years ago people used to think that because the heart was at the center of the body (roughly) that it was the source of all emotions and feelings. Nevertheless, modern medicine tells us~
The heart is an organ, no emotion generates from there.
The above sentence hung in the air for a moment, as my mind raced through all the thousands of ways I had expressed my love to another- in terms of my heart.
I love with my mind, with my actions, and my words.
The heart appeals to what's sentimental, or fluffy, or unsubstantial.
My mind is determined, aggressive, and sometimes over-active.
It sounds funny to say, "I love you with all my mind"; and yet at the same time it seems somewhat more profound. To love someone with my mind indicates that I'm conscious of what I'm doing and active in my caring for them.
On the other hand- if you've ever had to say good bye to someone you love, or held your first child, or can remember your first (good ;) kiss...you know the heart is involved. It races, or tightens, or aches...
So much for "no emotion generates from there"...
My daughter and I will have another talk- real soon :)
You are all in my thoughts tonight~ thank you for all the times you've let me know that I'm in yours :)
20 comments:
Welcome back from Flulandia!
oh - sorry to hear you were sick - glad to know you are better.
ah, the heart.
i used to wonder about the term "heartbroken" - thinking it was just an expression and that of course, you couldn't feel such a thing.
but i recall with great clarity a day i knew my heart was broken (by a child, who else can break a heart?). and yet, as i say in my profile, a mother's heart is never broken.
i lied.
hearts break all the time (when mine broke, i actually felt it - and clutched my chest).
and hearts mend.
i have no idea why i'm writing this in response to your post mayden.
a stretch of association.
Cora, I'm glad you are feeling better. hmm, the heart vs the mind.
When my brother passed away it was my heart that hurt, literally. And than a corner of it turned to stone.
Congratulations on that yellow belt for your son. Your daughters not interested?
congratulations to the cute kiddo'...I'm happy deepy' doo' that your back to your charming self...I gotta' park here but will get in touch tomorrow..kinda' late..and I'm hohummmm..sweepy'...ev' a nice day!!
Thanks Grunt- I can hug you now- except for the distance! :)
Bird and dear Schaumi~
This post actually went a bit longer and deleved into something too personal to share- and I deleted it. But somehow, some of what I was feeling came through anyway- both of you touched on it.
My heart ached yesterday- over something in the past, a situation over and done with...but the love and the pain still linger somewhat- even after all this time.
And what really bothers me is that my mind says one thing, but my "heart" says something else- and I am trying to find balance between the 2.
I appreciate your words and thoughts here- because you both reflected, in your own way, my feelings. I wanted to dismiss how my heart felt- and I can't- nor should I, but I also have to live with truth. What's done is done~ I can't un-ring the bell.
Lux- I have the afternoon to myself- I will write! :)
That's a good question your daughter asked. To me, soul and spirit are synonomous--I don't know if that is exactly biblical, because one of the two goes to heaven or the hot place and the other is what rises again with the new body. These are questions I always want to answer, but never find the time. I guess you could say the heart, but it is also a place of deceit--the mind, but that belongs to the mental realm and in some cases the physical. So in short, your daughter asked a toughie.
I'm glad you feel better.
Hi there... you look like you have lost weight...
Very profound question!! I find myself often wanting to really tell my kids how I feel and what I really think... but, as Jack Nickleson said... "the truth... you cant handle the truth..."
I wonder if and when I will ever be able to really talk to them about things... It took me until my 20's before I was ready to hear my parents stories... and then I wasnt really ready! lol
have a great week Cora! Continue to feel better! Did you get a flu shot?
(1) I was thinking the same thing as Kate. That cold must have hit you harder than you let on.
(2) You know, it's never too late to learn something new, like karate or piano. Although it is nice to admire qualities of the young that I myself don't have. You're probably the same way.
(3) There are some schools of physiology that are doing research to see if there are actually emotions and thought tied to other organs besides the brain. I don't buy it, at least at this point. But it would be interesting to think that we actually feel something for others in our hearts...literally.
Glad you're feeling better.
Love is what you do, not what you feel...
EOR-
J has been asking tough questions since she was a baby~
When she was 3 (dead serious- 3!) She looked up at me, out of the blue, and said- "Mom, are you sure that God isn't a woman?" LOL- I knew right then I had better dig a little deeper into theology if I was going to do a decent job raising this little girl :)
Kate- the words "You look like you've lost weight" and "I love you" mean exactly the same thing! :)
I love you too! lol
I was very ill- but I've also been back on the South Beach thing- trying to get another 15 off. It's so slow- but it is working.
And sometimes, you know, the inches that come off don't show up on the scale. That is happening too.
X~I lost almost 4 pounds in 12 hours- I was very ill... Thankfully it didn't last very long.
I always learn something new at your blog! But learning a new sport, or game, or hobby would be good for me- how to find the time to learn it is the problem :)
Interesting to think of the liver, or kidneys having emotions- which I would find hard to believe, but there is no question that my heart responds to the way I feel.
Iamnot...
You often give me potent bits of wisdom in tiny bite sized pieces :)
Thank you~
Yes- you are right.
Brilliant really- love IS what you do, not how you feel.
My actions speak louder than my words, and my feelings...
Hello Mayden. Would not know where to start on that soul thing ... so I won't and instead I thank you here for your recent words there!
Hey Mayden fair! BAdy doll, I'se jes' so sorry ter heah youse been ill--I could asent ya soem famous pork rind soup.
Congrats on the kids and their karate...wow.
As fer the soul/ heart thang...why I guess one reason we (most cultures too) feel in our "hearts" is that we know that the heart is life--the blood is life...and in some cases our love is our life, so we connect the two.
So happy youse feelin' better.
Please do not let my kids ask me this for a few more years! Thanks for your kind words ...
Glad you're feeling better. Congrats to your son. I have a fond respect for the martial arts (not so much though, for martial law; although I DO like Marshall Amps). Kudos as well for your daughter's soul questioning. It shows that she's on the right path.
hi. these are my thoughts on your daughter's question - for what its worth.
the soul, for each one of us, i think, lives in its own special place. some people do live in their heads. some - live in their gut. historically, i think societies have always wondered whether the heart or the brain held the soul - the lifeforce. i think the jury is still out.
i think that organs such as the liver and kidney secrete not only hormones, but also energy that contribute to our emotions. i think our bodies - and our blood - remembers things our minds and hearts choose to forget.
here is a splendid explanation of the soul and the corporeal.
"Just like the 'soul' of a musical composition is the composer's vision that energizes and gives life to the notes played in a musical composition--the actual notes are like the body expressing the vision and feeling of the soul within them. Each soul is the expression of G-d's intent and vision in creating that particular being."
something else i stumbled across here... a view of the soul as sort of layered, you know, like an onion. a g-dly soul - the breath of g-d and a desire to know the source of all - enclosed by an animal soul - our quest for self-preservation and enhancement - which, in turn is enclosed by our corporeal (our body).
i like this explanation. i sort of envision, like, a chemistry model - you know the soul being the nucleus and the corporeal being the machinery.
sorry to be so long-winded and preachy. your daughter is special to consider such philosophical questions at such a tender age. the link i gave you above is a great one ... full of much wisdom.
regarding heart breaks. yes one cannot un-ring the bell. but one call surrender the hurt. an ache of any kind we must never dismiss. it is a signal of something ... brewing.
kindest regards.
i'm not stalking you ... just ... came back coz i like your energy.
this line got me -
the heart is an organ, no emotion generates from there.
i think all our organs generate emotion and what we feel is the collective, the synergy of what our organs have generated.
if we chose to attend, and feel these things - such as heartbreak, or if we chose to repress/supress them - each choice will have vastly different outcomes. when the latter happens, we become sick - mentally, physically, either, both - dis-eased.
ok. now i probably sound like some wierd new age rabbi. sorry. great post, though.
Ben- Thanks for coming over :) You bring such a sense of peace with you- I look forward to your next post :)
Aunty- not sure you'll see this, but I drempt I went to Ga- and came over for a visit. I stood in the hallway of your house (you were in the kitchen) just so I could listen to you talk for a few minutes before I saw you face to face! :) I'm silly :)
Baron- Welcome! I look forward to reading your blog more often- we have a dear friend in common! :)
PW- such a man of mystery :) I think one day I might actually get down to the real you...but I like you as a "pug" too~
Pink R- Welcome to you as well! I so look forward to reading you~
I keep getting kicked out of your site though- something about "Active X". I will keep trying :)
I like the layered soul concept. Interesting...
When I look at a dead body (at a funeral)- especially of someone I loved and they loved me- there is no question that "they" are not there any longer. Something, aside from air, has left...and part of me- some tiny bit of intangible matter, has gone with them- or at least I have perceived it that way.
When I consider that someone who loved me (like my Grandmother) is now before God for all eternity- and her memories of me are with her, it's an amazing feeling.
With each soul that leaves me- I feel, in some way, that I get more connected to Something much greater than myself.
I also think that our soul is part of what gives us our character- or our personality. When we die, that personality goes beyond- the essesnce of who we are remains the same.
Do you use the abbreviation for "God" as "g-d" out of respect to Him? I think I read that some people do this because His name is too holy for us to speak. I am just curious :)
about dead bodies - yes. i think its true. its as though ... their animation has gone out of them (well, i guess because it has). did you ever see that movie 21 grams? its called that because one of the sentiments uttered in the movie is that the soul weighs 21 grams.
about those dear to us we have lost - yes it does feel like an amazing cosmic connection ...
about g-d ... yes its about respecting and honoring the sacredness of his name.
about the active x thing ... are you using IE or FIREFOX? try FIREFOX if you haven't already.
Careful if you drink that - you know what will happen! Glad to meet you. You are right she is a interesting woman!
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