Wednesday, May 16, 2007
How to say NO! to anything -- or anyone
"But, Uhhh"- she twists a strand of long hair around a finger, and in the graveled soil she kicks a pebble away with her pink Crocs...
"Why is it so hard for me to say "No"- TO ME?"
I'm faced with a difficult thing at the moment. Got a stinging realization about someone...ouch.
Yes- it really does sting- it's painful- and it only hurts because I care~
And if I didn't care...then it wouldn't hurt. Right?
Sigh- but I'm not like that. I don't seal my self/heart off to anyone- just to keep from getting injured. I never have and I hope I never will. But, perhaps this time...this time I have to hold back- tell myself "No".
The thing I've discovered was found in secret...something someone said or did and didn't think I would find out, or worse- didn't care. Oh- it's sad. I'm sad.
One of the most moving scenes I've ever watched in a movie was at the end of the most recent "Phantom of the Opera". Christine had been dead for a long time and her husband visits her grave on her birthday- only to find evidence that the Phantom was there earlier- having left a fresh rose and her ring- a token of the love he's held for her for 50 years or so.
That scene made me weep. The Phantom's love was twisted and harmful...but it was real- and it endured (and I know it was just a movie!). He kept it to himself for Christine's sake- he never again gave in to his desire to be with her...
Wonder how many times he had to tell himself "NO"?
Wonder how many times I will?
This was a silly post...but it felt good to write it down.
Hope you are having a beautiful day.
Mine has been- and I just need to let this thing go...
Hugs for the rest of you :)