Saturday, July 11, 2009
Anesthesia~ the foggy land between here and there...
For good reasons, which I don't care to explain in detail, I arrived at the hospital on Friday morning for an outpatient (gyn/girl stuff) surgical procedure.
General anesthesia was required because the procedure is rather painful, but luckily the recovery time is fairly quick. I was nervous. Very nervous. I don't scare easily, and while there was nothing to really be afraid of...it was personal and private- and strangers were going to see parts of me that I don't expose to the general public. "Sigh...I know, I know"- those Dr.'s and nurses see it all the time, but they don't see ME all the time. It wasn't an issue of pride, it was an issue of modesty. Well, mostly.
I suppose in this era of pantiless Paris Hiltons and wardrobe malfunctions my feelings might be a tad old fashioned, but they are my feelings (and body) after all. I also suppose that if I were shaped like Paris I might not mind being so exposed...but I'm not. Really NOT.
Once I was being prepped for my IV- I asked if someone could hook me up to a large Mojito, as this usually seems to help me with modesty issues :) I was informed that the mint leaves tend to clog up the plastic tubing in the IV line, at which point I said I would be happy to chew on the mint leaves if that would help. It was 8am and whether the OR crew was glad to have a patient with a sense of humor...or were concerned I was a lush- they promised the IV drugs would be better than a Mojito. They were true to their word.
I remember nothing between the moment they slipped the oxygen mask over my face and the moment I awoke in a good deal of pain, wondering if someone had left me alone with wild monkeys who poked me in the gut. Yeooowwwch!
While in the OR recovery room I thought (dreamed) I was sitting at my desk. Someone walked up to me and asked me for a pen or pencil, of which I have many, and with my left hand I was searching my desk drawer for the writing instrument. However, when I opened my eyes (because I couldn't find anything) I was merely reaching around under the sheets of the OR bed and pulling on the metal bar at my side. Thankfully no one seemed to notice. They did notice when I tried to pull the blanket over my head, but I have no idea why I did that. Maybe I was looking for a Mojito? lol
Once they moved me to the regular recovery room I drifted in and out of consciousness. At one point (and in a great deal of pain) I felt like I needed to find some information about the procedure I had just gone through. I was standing with a group of medical students who were looking at a wall (trying to read) which was covered in Latin. I stood there for a long time looking at the wall. Some of the words I understood and some I needed to copy into a note book. When I woke up (probably looking for a note book) I was in bed looking at the BARE wall of my recovery room. I was rather disappointed.
I probably had 10 or so of these dreams/visions, or commercials, in my head during the time of my recovery- but unfortunately I can't remember them. I do recall some were worrisome to me...dreams where I had forgotten something important, or I failed to do a vital task, or I was lost- or worse, one of my children were lost. I would wake up in a panic and then have to remind myself that it was just a dream...just a dream Cora.
I didn't have the presence of mind to relay what I had seen, not that any of it would have been coherent or logical. The next time I need surgery though I am going to ask whomever is with me to stand near me and listen to what I say and ask me questions to validate and/or record what I'm thinking. Who knows, there might be a story in there!
I'm home and resting now. I am definitely over the worst part of the pain issues, but still struggling with feeling a bit green. I think by Sunday afternoon I will feel almost normal again. I hope so~
Tomorrow my plans are to listen to the Golden Ganesh (I can hardly wait!!!) and read a great many blog posts which I have missed. Thank you for your thoughts and hugs- both past and present. I look forward to catching up with you all very soon <3>
(PS- any and all "Post-op" stories you have to share are most welcome! :)